Family, Fun, and Sabbath Keeping

Earlier this week my family and I participated in an Okanagan tradition.  Every year we gather up all of our inflatables and head to Penticton to float down the canal connecting the Okanagan and Skaha lakes.

We usually have a bit of a go of it at first.  We either agonize in the parking lot using hand-pumps to inflate our stuff in the heat of the day or we save our lungs and line up to get someone else to do it, for a questionable fee.  It’s kind of a lose-lose situation.  We also often find ourselves playing a game of “hurry up and wait” while we send friends down to the other end of the canal to drop off a vehicle so we have a convenient way to get back home. 

This time around was no exception; it took us over an hour after arriving at the canal to actually get into the water.  Everyone ritualistically slathered on sunscreen (not I, although my macho-ism got the best of me.  Halfway down the ride I started to wonder if someone was cooking bacon.  No, It was just my skin sizzling in the afternoon sun), and jumped awkwardly into our already semi-deflated boats.

Now we could relax.  The best thing about floating down the canal is the time spent together as a family.  Looking to have some family time?  Try throwing the kids on some inner tubes, tying them all together (the tubes not the kids) and sitting there while the current does its work.  What else can they do now but sit there and laugh and talk?  And eat a crazy amount of snacks?  And burn?  And say, heaven forbid, that they’re bored?

I got to spend two hours interacting with my family.  We talked about everything and nothing.  At one point my oldest son kept asking me which “skater brands” were cool when I was a kid.  I’m not sure if there were any skater brands when I was a kid.  For that matter, I probably wasn’t cool enough to know!  But the conversation led to questions about how I was raised, what grandma and grandpa was like to live with, and the choices that I made, good and bad, when I was his age.  As I was answering the questions, all I could think was, why don’t we do this kind of thing more often?

Surveys have shown that when kids are asked what makes a happy family they respond that a happy family is one that spends time together.  It’s sad then that as a society we’re actually spending less time with our families than ever.  The danger of this is in the transitioning of family units from loving support networks where the nurturing of character takes place to a kind of pseudo social housing.  The basic support apparatus may be in place, but a deep-rooted connection, shared story, and legacy is missing.

We have to be assertive when confronting the distractions that threaten family time.  Kids are busier than ever with all their activities, and parent(s) are often consumed with work.  But if our children are suggesting that happiness is found in time spent together, we need to get more aggressive with re-prioritizing our schedules. 

We can do this by adopting a Sabbath attitude for our families.  Sabbath is a time or day set aside to resist cultural norms and revel in the joys of life.  When we adopt a Sabbath attitude we don’t allow outside pressures to dictate our time together.  A Sabbath attitude reclaims time, allowing leisure to be food for our family’s soul.

Here are some ideas for incorporating this attitude into your family schedule.  Try having a no-screen day.  Shut off computers and TV’s and ipods, and plan to revel in the great outdoors together.  Make sure to have family dinners together, at least one meal a day, and revel in the stories your family has experienced throughout the week.  And commit your family to a social justice project; instead of going to another movie, revel in the joy of helping others in your community.

Of course you can also float lazily down the canal in Penticton, roasting your collective bodies under the unforgiving sun of the Okanagan, but reveling in the time spent with the people you care most about.  Now that’s a happy place.