Guest Post: "Why I'm NOT Too Old For Youth Ministry"

Here's for an interesting discussion. It's a snippet from a YM360 post:

When is a youth worker too old to be effective?

I’ve noticed something that happens to us youth workers around our mid-30′s, or so. We find ourselves unable to naturally relate to teenagers. Most of us have reached a point where we don’t automatically pick up on their references like we did in our 20′s. They mention a fad or a movie and we realize we have no idea what they’re talking about. This happens enough, and it begins to bother us.

We begin to think that means we’re too old. We hear a clock ticking inside of us. We say something like, “I’ve lost my relevance.”

There are other signs, as well . . .

The needle on our fun-meter is not as often moved by the games and the recreation. We think, “I need to move on to more adult things.”

We see our peers “advancing” to become Minister to Adults or Teaching Pastors. We say to ourselves, “I need to move on to real ministry.”

We see our friends leaving the ministry. We say to ourselves, “Is it time for me to quit playing around and get a real job?”

As an old youth worker, I’ll chime into the discussion (but it’s got to be quick because I’ll have to run to the bathroom, eat my oatmeal, and then take a nap).

1. I’ve never felt more effective in youth ministry than I do now.
  
2. I don’t believe teenagers care about relevance… they care about relationships.

3. Having had 3 teenagers live in my home, I know more about teens now than I ever did and can literally talk “their language” more accurate than I could when I was in my 20′s.

4. I’m closer to Jesus than I’ve ever been and I definitely have more wisdom to pass on (which was the thesis of the YM360 post).

5. I’m more patient, realistic and encouraging about spiritual growth. I better see the big-picture of sanctification than I did when I was younger and equated “program attendance” to “spiritual growth.”

Every Wednesday night my home is filled with 10th grade boys, and after sharing a meal together, we talk, read Scripture, confess our sins, and rejoice in the power of the Holy Spirit and the presence of God in our lives. It’s an unbelievable discipleship experience. Very different than how I discipled teenagers when I was in my 20′s.

I don’t know if these 10th grade guys give me respect because I “was” a full-time youth pastor for 29 years, if they endure me because I’m now a “volunteer” or if they like me because I’m “old” and they feel sorry for me (see photo above when I was the only one to wear something to “Crazy Christmas Sweater Dinner”).

I think they respect me because they know that I love them.

I don’t know all the names to their favorite songs/bands, I can’t keep up with all the new slang connected to genitalia, I’m usually the first one “out” when we play dodgeball… but, I know I’m an effective youth worker because I understand them, I know Jesus, and I depend on the Holy Spirt for everything I do when I’m with them.

When I was younger, unfortunately I think I depended more on my personality, charisma and drive.

Okay, that’s enough… now I got to go pee.

Question: When it comes to youth ministry... would you rather have young leaders or older leaders? Pros? Cons?

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Guest post from a great friend in youth ministry.

Recreating vision in an over-managed culture

If leadership is vision (why) then management should follow (how).

I think vision ALWAYS proceeds and rises above management. As vision grows, management will follow. BEWARE when management outgrows vision. When that happens, you have peaked in your influence as a person, organization, ecclesia, and context. Over-management can constipate creativity, minimize mission, and overlook vision.

Furthermore, it is interesting when a leadership team/organization begins to see their influence peak (and fall) and scrabble to strengthen management (how to strengthen the how) rather than inspire, create vision, and build buy in (recreating the why’s). Just look at RIM; rather than recreate vision they are changing management. Let’s see where that goes for the “vision” struggling company.

Another great example of over management would be the photo-film giant Kodak; who originally created the digital film in the 1970’s but decided to shelf the idea because of their multi-million dollar success at the time. Great lesson!

Question: How do you create vision? Evaluate vision? Re-create vision?

TBH with Christ

We kicked off a series called TBH with Christ with EC NGM.  Here are some of the honest, uncut, and uncensored, questions that came through over texts. We will try to start a conversation with each of these text questions. Feel free to leave a comment.

If you pray does it help you grow a beard?

Yes… check out the Vintage 21 videos on Youtube.

Do you think its right to say our religion is better than others?

No… I don’t think its right to say our religion (assuming Christianity) is better than others. With that said, out of the 33,000 different religions and cults in our world, Christianity is the only one that introduces grace.

If weed is bad why did God create it?

This is a great question… Let me give some perspective. I believe God created everything; including humans, animals, planets, universe, EVERYTHING including sex, and hemp. With that said God also gave humans the ability to manage His creation; thus, taking ownership of it. Now… because we live in a world that is evil; experiencing pain and gives pain, we also pain creation by our evil deeds. For example, what God created us in return abuse? We can abuse sex (ie, porn), abuse food (ie junk), abuse hemp (by creating weed) even though God created them… not for evil intention but for humanity to be in unity with each other and God. Apostle Paul said… everything is permissible but not beneficial. In the same way, even though God created everything, humanity can abuse because of our evil intent; thus not beneficial (unless used for medical reasons).

Whenever I pray and ask God something, why doesn’t he ever answer! Why should I be looking for? A sign?

Best teaching that someone gave me is God ANSWERS ALL prayers in 4 ways:

NO – because we ask out of our selfishness rather than His goodness – ie, Porsche

GROW – because we aren’t ready for the answer

SLOW – He wants us to realize the process is just as important as the answer

GO – He answers

Sometimes our prayers are legit but out of our control (ie, parents to quit fighting, etc.) that only God or those people can control. With that said, nothing is impossible with God. Miracles STILL happen! Keep praying because pray is more than a slot machine for answered prayers but a two way conversation with God that He desires to grow.

I feel alone when I pray to God… and I don’t know what to do?

TBH, I think aloneness or loneliness is the result of not knowing our purpose in life. I feel for ya and know how your feel yet I have found  if I know my purpose loneliness isn’t the result but fun, adventure, and pure awesomeness! So, my question back is how do we find purpose? I think Jesus nailed it pretty good in John 10:10… Check it out and make Tuesday nights a priority to find your purpose… you won’t be disappointed.

Nathan – cane you share one of the prayers that god answered from when you talked to God as an atheist?

I will get him to answer that shortly :)

What is God suppose to do in our lives?

Good question… check out the video:

What is a way to make praying an everyday thing?

As a teenager I prayed before I went to bed as this was the best time for me.  I put in my journal, “captains log” points of prayer for seeking God’s will, requests for others, and for Him to forgive me of my sins/personal requests WITH reading the Bible.

I read a PROVERB of a day and a chapter in the New Testament a day. This helped me understand who God was, what He did/does for me, and to understand myself. It really helped me as a teenager

Why is God above us?

Bible says God is everywhere.

If you don’t pray outloud how do you know God hears you?

Yes… because God is all-knowing.

What is the purpose of humans if we only trouble God?

We don’t trouble God. He came to save us from our own trouble and then calls us to live a life that makes our world better.

Why does God judge us on how to live and which way we live, when he says in the Bible that he doesn’t judge and loves us all?

There are two types of judgment that God gives. First is a judgment of sin which equals death; not only physical death but spiritual death. God sent His Son, Jesus, to take away the sins of the world through salvation. It is a gift that we can either receive or reject.

The second type of judgment is based on accountability on how we live our lives… do we truly live for God or ourselves? Make the world a better place or not?  This is a post-based judgment.

With that said, God doesn’t judge us because he hates us! He judges us based on finding righteousness with God. Check out Jn 3:16-17; Romans 5:8.

I sort of believe in God but I really want to believe in him, but it’s hard to believe in some things. I’m confused and I don’t know what to do?

Keep asking questions! Keep coming out to youth. Get connected to your Refuel leader. This will help!

How do you know when you get the word from God? Does he choose when you get it?

All “words” from God should line up with God’s Word, encourage you, and give you peace.

Does God say legit?

Yes… aka “It is finished” - Jesus on the Cross

Kelly, what is your favorite thing about God?

I will get Kelly to answer this J

5 Ways to Reach Your Goals in 2012

One of my favorite things to do is to set big picture goals in ministry, home life, and for myself. It is something that gives me motivation but also encourages me on how my past goals have been attained.

King Solomon, who was the wisest and wealthiest man in his day said,

             "without a vision people will perish..."

In the same way, when we DONT set goals we naturally allow our full potential in our skill, relationships, and purpose God to erode. Here are some ways that have helped me achieve some goals:

Write down 3-4 goals

I encourage you to write down 3-4 goals for your life, relationships, and occupation. At the same time, I have known people who would write down 20-25 goals but it becomes unrealistic to reach. Keep it simple. 

Write down an action plan

Goals NEED an action plan. Without an action plan goals are just dreams. I have used the S.M.A.R.T template for goals:

Specific - are detailed on what you want to accomplish. 

Measurable - someone once said, "Inch by inch life is a sinch. Yard by yard, life gets hard." goals need to be managed. I do this by writing down 3-4 actions steps/goal.

Actionable - use action! 

Realistic - goals that are realistic stretch you but dont break you.

Time-bound - set a timeline. Without a realitistic timeline, goals become too far fetched.

Write down motivators

Lets face it! Life has its unexpected surprises and pitfalls. When you take time to write down WHY you have these goals, the motivators will HELP you when life gets tough.  

Don’t forget relationships!

 Goals without relationships become dull. The top 3 resolutions of all time are to:

• Loose weight
• Stop smoking
• Get out of debt

These resolutions aren't bad but without relationships that cheer us on, keep us accountable, and offer advice goals become unattainable. We can become discouraged, beat ourselves up, and give up on our goals. But, through accountability, ANY goal is achievable. Which relationships in your life can help support you with your goals? Parents? Spouse? Friend? Mentor? Perhaps finding an accountability relationship for each of your goals will help you move forward. 

Keep Perspective

We are all called to purpose. Goals need to be focused on the God-given purpose for your life. As King Solomon wisely put it that people perish with vision, we also perish without a clear, crisp persepective that comes from God. How are you planning to keep God in the big picture? Without him, our goals become limited and perhaps self-centered.

I hope this can help you as it has definitely helped me.

May 2012 best your best year ever!

Tis the season for... Being politically correct?

Just a curious thought here, but is being politically correct represent tolerance; which I totally agree with; or creating a pluralistic worldview where beliefs, morals, and values become diluted?

I am more concerned for the next generation to stand up for NOTHING because truth is somehow subjective by accepting EVERYTHING out of a pluralistic worldview.

On the flip side, standing up for truth needs to be honed in tolerance. Tolerance is having the maturity to respect people's values enough to also stand up for their own... I would call this being Biblically correct.

NOW... before you think I am another Bible pusher, I'm not AS MUCH AS being Biblically correct reveals love, grace, and truth.

The Bible, God, Jesus all reveal LOVE + TRUTH = TOLERANCE. Throughout the Biblical, we see the need to accept others (Jesus did that ALL the time) and also revealed truth to them (religious leaders, Gentiles, prositutes, government officials). Furthremore, Jesus calls US (as followers of Christ) to accept others. I call them the other commands (Eph 4:13; Jn 13:3; James 5:16; Jn 13:14... in fact, there are dozen of words in the New Testament that command Christians to be tolerant with each other). Let me define tolerance again; just in case, that it is to RESPECT others enought to stand up for truth.

How are you revealing tolerance to the next generation? Are you more concerned about being politically correct or being Biblically correct; that is, being a follower of Jesus? 

May this Season from Dec 25-Jan 1; which represents new life (Dec 25) and new beginnings (Jan 1), be one of conviction and tolerance, NOT compromise and pluralism. It is really a choice